lunatic96 on 7/12/2007 at 20:02

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Man these last 2 pages have been really off-topic.

N'Al on 7/12/2007 at 20:45

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Also, I just finished watching The Final Cut version of the movie, so nyar nyar nyar to all those who haven't yet. :cool:

Harvester on 8/12/2007 at 00:29

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So what did you think of it? Has the image quality been improved from the kind-of-lousy previous Director's Cut DVD? And have they fixed the '6 replicants, 1 dies, that leaves 4' error?

june gloom on 8/12/2007 at 03:11

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:laff: :laff: :laff:

june gloom on 8/12/2007 at 09:55

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I just watched Alien Resurrection for the first time in like 4 years. Holy Christ, it's even worse than I remembered.

First off, I seriously do not care what anyone says. Joss Whedon is a hack who writes everything like it's a comic book. He never should have been allowed near the Alien franchise. He ruined it long before Paul motherfucking Anderson was even an apple in the Internet Hate Machine's eye. I hope he dies in a fire for his terrible script. It has a few good parts, but it escalates far too early and there's zero buildup of suspense.

The directing? Never let a Frenchman direct a horror movie. The way Jeunet likes to zoom in on people's faces at an odd angle is especially annoying, and makes it feel like some horrible college film thesis. The tone he tries to set is constantly changing and it's annoying- wait it's a surreal comedy, no wait now it's a horror flick, no wait now it's action, no wait now it's a comedy again, no wait Jeunet's a prick. And what was with the subtle lesbian undertones?

That said, I really liked the setting. In a way, it was like a dark version of the Nostromo. But I wasn't happy with the alien hive. The hive in Aliens was smooth, almost skeletal in a sense. The hive in Alien Resurrection reminded me of those horrible tentacle rape .gifs you used to see back in 1999. It didn't help that Ripley basically disappears into that writhing mass of wrong.

Why did the aliens all have to fucking breathe steam? They never did before. These things don't breathe, period. They're biomechanical constructs created by the Space Jockey race as a weapon of war. Also, the sequence where the alien pounds on the button and freezes the guard would have been a lot less fucking stupid if the alien had used his HAND and not his inner jaw. The inner jaw is for puncturing skulls, not basic object manipulation. And the so-called newborn? What a horrid concept done in a horrible way. The whole thing felt tacked on. The scene in the nest where the scientist is mumbling about how the queen took on a secondary reproduction scene would've been a lot better if he hadn't taken on the ridiculous "THIS IS RIPLEY'S GIFT TO HER" blah blah horseshit. If he had just kept muttering on in scientific terms, that would've been different, but no, he actually fucking says "you are a beautiful beautiful butterfly." I puked in my mouth a little.

I can't decide which is worse: Joss Whedon's fetish for ensemble casts or the fact that the members of said casts all sound the same. The worst thing was, the only characters worth remembering in Alien Resurrection were the ones who survived all the way to the end. At least it was interesting seeing Gary Dourdan from before he was cool.

This movie could have been so much better with: a different script, a different director, maybe a different/reduced cast, a different plot, and basically was not this movie. And no fucking newborn.