icemann on 2/3/2019 at 07:15
As long as its still enjoyable to play and doesnt leave you thinking about the past then no worries.
Otherwise I'd say to move to a different MMO or go the path I did and devote yourself to going through your backlog of unplayed and unfinished games. WoW does tend to leave you with a MASSIVE backlog over time.
Or try and play through an entire franchise of a series which I've found fun to do. For that I find picking franchises you enjoyed as a kid to be fun, especially if you've not played the more recent entries or it has been a longtime since you last played them.
heywood on 2/3/2019 at 13:28
Quote Posted by Gray
One problem is that I am still in Scotland. I moved here for HER, so everything here reminds me of her. On the other hand, I can not afford to move back to my home country. Brexit isn't helping.
I haven't experienced the same kind of loss, so I don't feel I can give you advice on handling the day to day grief. But at some people you'll be ready to look forward again, and when you are I highly recommend leaving Scotland for a fresh start. Either go back to your home country, or go someplace sunny. Long, dark winters really affect our moods.
icemann on 2/3/2019 at 16:04
Second that. Change of scenery sounds like the best, otherwise be constant reminders.
Necrohowl on 2/3/2019 at 22:00
Read a philosophical book.
I recommend Schopenhauer then Nietzsche, or Nietzsche then Schopenhauer...Not sure if one of the two will give you a reverse effect.
Tocky on 6/3/2019 at 01:03
Actually a book isn't such a bad idea. It takes you away from reality for awhile. I would recommend fiction, as immersive a story as you can find, in any genre. My sister became an avid reader since she lost her husband to Huntington's disease. The amusing part is she likes historical books about Scotland. Highlander stuff is her favorite.
SubJeff on 6/3/2019 at 22:50
Quote Posted by Tocky
she likes historical books about Scotland. Highlander stuff is her favorite.
Tocky, I need to tell you something...
Tocky on 7/3/2019 at 00:11
Perhaps I should have said historical settings. I guess I can't say much because I read a lot of Bernard Cornwell novels. They too are fiction but at least they are well researched and based on actual events. Agincourt of which Shakespeare gave his Henry V St. Crispin's day speech was particularly engrossing. I love the detail he gives a battle. You often come to understand why a battle was won. And too there is just something about a description of feeling through an arrow shaft how the arrow head is scraping along the back of someones skull after it has been driven through an eye socket.
Gray on 10/3/2019 at 01:59
Quote Posted by heywood
Long, dark winters really affect our moods.
Hahahahahahahaha....
*sniff*
I'm sorry, you don't know me well enough to realise why that's funny. I moved a little over 1000 miles south to get to Scotland. I'm from the arctic. Scotland is always too warm and never has any seasons, just sideways rain that goes from +5C to +15C. February isn't winter unless it's -32C and a metre of snow. Glasgow had +17C. IN FEBRUARY! Give me 8 months of snow, not 3 days. Cold? I beg to differ.
:ahem:
I apologise for that unnecessary outburst, I'm just trying to prove the point that this is a vastly different climate. Much, MUCH warmer. And rainier.
And yes, the weather does affect your mood, you are entirely correct in that. I'm from one of the sunniest places in Sweden, and I now live where the skies are always grey. That in itself is a very big change, and I do notice how it affects my mood. Maybe that explains why Britons drink so much more than I'm used to.
Thank you for that line though, it did give me a good laugh and cheered me up a bit.
[Edit]
I did read Nietzsche way back, 20-odd years ago, and I agree with about half of it. Not the stupid bits. Did not read Schopenhauer yet. As much as I enjoy philosophy, I''m pretty sure it won't solve my problem. I'm pretty old and I have a fairly good, solid idea about myself and the world. I am at my core a very calm, relaxed, open person, almost nice if you ignore the sarcasm, both naive optimist and bitter cynic, my problem is not with my annoying personality, it is how to deal with the loss of the most important person in my life.
[Edit again]
Since my previous post, I had a conversation with my stepdaughter, and the bags of clothes are now moved out, so that she and my sister-in-law can go through them. We also discussed vague plans for something to do with the ashes. Again, I don't really care where, I just need ONE place to be able to go to for any important dates. I have missed not being able to go anywhere to grieve, but that might change soonish. Things are moving.
Mr.Duck on 11/3/2019 at 09:48
<3
heywood on 11/3/2019 at 13:07
Quote Posted by Gray
Hahahahahahahaha....
*sniff*
I'm sorry, you don't know me well enough to realise why that's funny. I moved a little over 1000 miles south to get to Scotland. I'm from the arctic. Scotland is always too warm and never has any seasons, just sideways rain that goes from +5C to +15C. February isn't winter unless it's -32C and a metre of snow. Glasgow had +17C. IN FEBRUARY! Give me 8 months of snow, not 3 days. Cold? I beg to differ.
:ahem:
I apologise for that unnecessary outburst, I'm just trying to prove the point that this is a vastly different climate. Much, MUCH warmer. And rainier.
And yes, the weather does affect your mood, you are entirely correct in that. I'm from one of the sunniest places in Sweden, and I now live where the skies are always grey. That in itself is a very big change, and I do notice how it affects my mood. Maybe that explains why Britons drink so much more than I'm used to.
Thank you for that line though, it did give me a good laugh and cheered me up a bit.
It's not about the cold. Scotland doesn't really get cold (or warm for that matter). What makes Scotland so dreary in winter is that it's always overcast, and it's windy and raining most days. It's just unpleasant to be outside. Lack of sunshine is strongy linked with seasonal depression and mood disorders. That's why they drink a lot.
I also grew up in a place with cold, snowy winters, and I live in a place now that is a lot colder (at least in the winters) and a lot snowier than Scotland. But in the middle of the winter, between the snow storms, we get lovely crisp, cold, sunny days, where it's nice to be outside. And I enjoy the snow sports.
I spent one unusually dark winter near Weymouth in the South of England where it was blustery and raining most days, and when it wasn't raining it was still overcast and humid. There was one stretch where the sun didn't come out for over 40 days, and everything stayed wet and soggy/muddy all winter. It was the most, awful depressing winter I've ever had. Relatives tell me Scotland is like that most winters.
In any case, I still advocate moving to someplace sunnier, even if you don't want to move South. Not immediately, but once you're far enough along in the grieving process to put a little separation between you and your step-daughter.