pavlovscat on 7/5/2007 at 16:26
Quote Posted by Dia
Face it, if you married someone for physical reasons only your marriage won't make it past the first three months. And you can love each other's soul totally and absolutely, but that won't change the fact that if sex is unsatisfactory, there could be some serious problems on your horizon. You don't get married and live happily ever after, I'm afraid. You'll have more than enough problems and adjustments to make living with each other during your first five years so why add sexual tension and stress to the mix?
Also, consider that if you've been waiting around for 25 years or so thinking about sex, wanting sex, fantasizing about sex and then your first time is half-way decent, you'll hear bells & feel earthquakes - no matter how you feel about the person. However, if you have no reference point, how do you know if was really that good? Unfortunately, I have also experienced the tendency many virgins have of "falling in love" with the person who took their virginity. Once all those new feelings have been released, you mistake sex for love never having know about "just sex" with anyone. This can be a real pain in the ass, especially for the taker...that is a big reason I haven't messed with virgins in a long time (aside from the fact that I am married :rolleyes:).
Marry your best friend...if you have a good foundation relationship, and truly like a person, in addition to loving them (& yes there is a BIG difference), you are more likely to be able to make the sex part work. Chemistry happens, but skills can be learned to keep sex fun for both partners.
jimjack on 7/5/2007 at 16:28
Quote Posted by Fascist
I was born in a test tube. What, i'm Scottish.
But seriously, apart from the pearly penile papules and the crooked penis due to excessive masturbation, i am in 100% good condition and of breeding age, who should be passing on his good genes like a good lifeform. But it doesn't happen. This confuses me.
First of this sef-deprecating attitude gives all Scots a bad name.
Secondly or maybe first:
Excessive wanking causes a crooked penis? :wot: CLARIFY THIS PLZ.
Rogue Keeper on 7/5/2007 at 16:39
Quote Posted by Kolya
Right now you miss out willingly but blindly on a great experience and an essential part of growing up. Love and sex won't be the same when you are 20 or 25 like it was when you were 16 or 17.
This is a very individual outlook on sexuality, you know. I think I'm with Enchantermon here - not for everyone is sex equally important, as there is something called "sex drive" and every person has more or less different level of sex drive than someone lese.
Also, do 16s-17s really know better when they truly love instead of just "thinking" they love? Or they better know how to enjoy the bedtime properly, without stress? But again that's strongly individual, based on mental maturity of a person. I don't know who is more idealistic now...
Gingerbread Man on 7/5/2007 at 16:44
Jesus Christ.
Look, you gloomy ones seem to be confusing "Having Sex With Someone" with "Getting To Know Someone Well Enough To Have Sex With Them"
Sex is fun and light-hearted and shouldn't be the focus of all this hilarious angst / advice.
Relationships -- well, I can easily see how that's fraught with uncomfortableness and terror for the more introverted or underconfident.
Rogue Keeper on 7/5/2007 at 16:51
Ok, let's fuck.
pavlovscat on 7/5/2007 at 16:58
Quote Posted by Gingerbread Man
Look, you gloomy ones seem to be confusing "Having Sex With Someone" with "Getting To Know Someone Well Enough To Have Sex With Them"
Why do you have to know someone to have sex with them? Anonymous sex can be really good...at least until the next morning.
Ko0K on 7/5/2007 at 17:01
No kidding... The fact this is a hot topic must be an indication of some sort. To be fair, the guy didn't exactly ask for advice by saying "What do you think?" in his first post. That said, if a willing partner is what's being sought, there is always adult friend finder and such. If social acceptance is the issue, then you're stuck with your personality, so the sooner you learn to accept yourself for who you are the sooner you will make your own life easier.
Gingerbread Man on 7/5/2007 at 17:02
Quote Posted by pavlovscat
Why do you have to know someone to have sex with them? Anonymous sex can be really good...at least until the next morning.
That's not at all what I said. They're two different, though not exclusive, things. And everyone whinging about the awkwardness and terror of sex is actually winging about the awkwardness and terror they feel about getting to know someone else well enough to fuck them.
Or wait, were you trying to be
edgy?
TTK12G3 on 7/5/2007 at 17:36
This thread is refreshing.
flexbuster on 7/5/2007 at 17:54
Refreshing, absurd, one or the other.
Seriously though, just stop worrying about it. I mean, it's not as if getting laid is actually a difficult thing - girls are horny just like guys are, and there are plenty females of looser ethical standards out there, especially these days it seems. Just don't worry about it or put too much emphasis on it. The last thing you want to do is obsess about getting sex like some 14-year-old who just heard of the act.
