Strangeblue on 31/1/2007 at 07:03

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Argggh! Never, ever volunteer for anything. Especially if anyone tells you "you don't have to do anything; we just need another body." Feh! Lyin' sack o pr0n....

This is me venting: (not to be taken too damned seriously, I'm just really frustrated)

OK, so... several months ago I was asked to join the regional board of a certain professional oganization. I was not too keen to do this, citing the excuse that board membership tends to come with... responsibilities and I didn't want any. "Oh, nonono," I was told. "You won't have to do anything but be a name on a list, cast an occasional vote for form's sake, and show up to about 2 meetings a year." Still suspicious, I said "but why me? I am a nobody. I have no name or reputation to lend you and I'm not rich enough or connected enough to get you money." "But you have a book in print and that makes you a Fully Active Member--we don't have many of those and we want to encourage more, so if you are on the board, others will be reassured that we're serious about this." Reluctantly, I agreed, after extracting a promise that I would have no further responsibilities than those previously listed.

Sucker.

Now, a mere 4 months later, I am armpit deep in Things That Need Doing!

Y'see... there's this little convention... and it's in our town and our bailiwick
and even though we're not on the organizing committe or officially sponsoring anything, we're the regional arm of a rather important industry group and it would be smart for us to be included in some fashion. So we were asked to do a very small, insignificant thing on an insignificant day. And pay for it. And we said "sure, we can do that. It's for the fans, right? Good stuff. We're in."

From the very beginning the Chair(woe)man has been a major pain to work with, even when she was asking favors of us. First she asked us to do this gig on Friday, then she changed her mind and said Thursday. Then back to Friday. She's done a lot to hide us, to minimize our impact and to put us as both an organization and as individuals into the worst programming positions she can--where we'll be virtually invisible. But she still wants stuff out of us an she wants us to read her mind and make it what she wants without her appearing to "influence" us. Every suggestion we made initially, she shot down. So we thought, "OK. We can play that--and make you look like a piker. We're gonna do this up RIGHT! See how y'like them apples."

But once that decision was made, no one on the regional board had any idea what to do. We're supposed to provide a "cocktail party" for Friday night of the convention and they're all sick of the same old bull. The Chair(woe)man wants us to do something "educational... and fun!" We all want to kill her and stuff her in a box to be shipped to Zimbabwe tied under the slowest non-endangered bird we can find in hopes that the collecting guano will rot the ropes and cause her remains to be lost in the depths of the Atlantic where it will be devoured by sharks and pelagic worms.

And as we sat there, cudgeling our collective brains I came up with an idea I thought was much fun--and not entirely serious--but doable. Not cheap however. Everyone thinks it's a great idea! Fabulous, wonderful...

"Hey, how 'bout you put that together for us, 'Blue? You seem to have the connections and the knowledge."

"Erm... I'm kind of busy at the moment. And wasn't I supposed to be just a figurehead?"

"Well, yeah, but this is do-or-die time and this is such a great idea and you know what you're doing and you're in town and you have a flexible schedule...."

Oi...

Well, eventually they beat me down. And I made the phone calls and got the specs and made a proposal and got an answer and a go-ahead. Then I had to make an appointment to write up the contract and hand over the check--which I had to wait 2 weeks for and had to get signed by both the Treasurer and the Prez. And all this time I was working and chasing other things that were far more important to me. But finally it was done and I heaved a sigh of relief.

The Chair(woe)man didn't like it. It didn't meet some of her pet "special needs"--which had never been brought up before. But we said "sorry, lady. This is both Educational and Fun--as you asked for. And it's cool and people love it." She was not happy with us, but she went away, grumbling.... (Oh, if we had only known....) But we were pleased with ourselves and we were now the organizers of the Neatest Gathering At the Whole Convention. (yay us.)

Until Other Things were dropped in our laps.

It appeared that the Chair(woe)man had lost the support of a different organization, which had been favored with the much tastier date and time for an event which had been taken away from us. So she had appealed directly to our National Board. Who had said "Sure! We can do that!"

So arrangements were made to do the basic, boring cocktail reception for the Opening Date--which is what we were supposed to do in the first place.

One week before the event we are informed that we, the regional, are responsible for coming up with centerpieces and table cards for this shindig. And they really should be something that let's the attendees know that... wait for it... our organization is now the Co-Sponsor of the whole event.

Gulp.

What shall we do?! Oh, Woe Is Us! We is but a poor regional full of guys and now we must make centerpieces?! What be these centerpiece things? Gals: quick, explain this to us! What shall we do that is Fun and Cool and Identifies our Group?

Enter big-mouth me, again. I say "how 'bout we take this toy that is the same thing as our logo and we shall put it in a boquet and put the boquets on the tables? Voila: Centerpiece that is Cool and Fun and Identifies Our Group!

"Oh, 'Blue! You so clever! Wonderful, wonderful! Now make it so."

"B-b-b-b-but... I'm working. I have a deadline. I'm not any good at centerpieces. Hire someone! I know for nothing!"

"Nononono.... You're fabulous! You're clever! You're creative! You live only 10 minutes from the convention site!"

*uck.

Reluctantly I say "OK, I buy parts...."

Then comes another ISSUE. The coctail party we just found ourselves making centerpieces for was moved to... yes, you guessed it--Friday! So it will compete with the other event we are already on the hook for. AND there will be NOTHING on Thursday.

Stupid me makes another really goofy suggestion. And gets stuck managing it, too.

And while all this is going on I am also: finishing a job, making a new work proposal, going out of town for a weekend on business, house-sitting for my mom who lives on the opposite side of the Sound, and juggling 2 groups of visiting friends from WAY out of town. Oh yeah... and working on ANOTHER convention for a different group altogether. And there's the little matter of trying to get some sleep and spend some cuddlin' time with my sweetie... who has to listen to me bitch and whine about all this and is therefore not very cuddly.

Blargh. I need to learn to keep my mouth shut

And never volunteer for anything. Ever. Again!

Fuck.

henke on 31/1/2007 at 08:29

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*sympathy* :(

Briareos H on 31/1/2007 at 08:56

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Bah, it's not like everything was fully forced on you. Take it relaxed, work your ass off to get these events done in a spectacular manner and don't do it ever again. That's an interesting life experience, and the pressure won't last long :)

Good luck, you seem energetic enough to make it awesome. Next time, just try to open your mouth in a bit more thoughtful manner (i.e. NOT) ;)

Shayde on 31/1/2007 at 10:58

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Aww blue my condolences.

You seem to be a responsible, hard working person which is good, but in the grand scheme of things, how will it effect your life if the launch is a flop?

You'll still be a published author with mad ferrets who gets to live on a boat.
Win!

Go home, eat some rich chocolate cake, drink some wine and have some sex.
Things will seem much less vital after that. :)

dlw6 on 31/1/2007 at 13:45

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Struck down by strategic incompetence, that sucks. Any profession worthy of the title should have a means to impose consequences for misconduct or incompetence by its members. Can you increase the sponsorship cost to the head organization by $500 every time the date changes? Publish "project minutes" so as to expose her foolishness? Arrange a recall election?

Don