june gloom on 26/6/2010 at 05:41

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Sometimes I wonder if I enjoy depressing songs because I worry that the only emotions I can feel are anger, irritation and cruel amusement, and this is my way of trying to find something that evokes something different.

Or maybe I'm just an asshole who likes making other people depressed, like by showing them the lyrics to Dreaming Neon Black. (That one usually makes them come back pissed off at me for making them sad. It's hilarious.)

You ever read the lyrics from some post-hardcore bands? Some shockingly dark shit out there, which is weird 'cuz they usually sing them over heavy music. Somehow that makes it worse.

So here's my challenge to you guys- find me the darkest fucking song out there, the despair event horizon of music. Be sure to provide lyrics. Enable me in trolling my friends!

Koki on 26/6/2010 at 06:39

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If you want to "troll" people, just play Bjork?

Namdrol on 26/6/2010 at 07:35

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Rhoda Dakar, 'The Old Boiler'
Wins this absolutely hands down, a nice cheery ditty about rape from the female perspective.
(It's the screams at the end which really make it)
I put it on Henke's spotify list so a few people from here heard it.

You asked for the lyrics, so here goes.


I went out shopping last saturday
I was getting some gear, and this guy offered to pay
Who's the hunk? I think to myself
For so many years I've been left on the shelf
An old boiler

Then we went walking back down the high street
And I felt so proud because he looked so neat
He was a real hard man, tough as they come
He said I was cool but I still felt like
An old boiler

He bid me "Come out", how could I say no?
He said "Meet me at eight round my place, you know"
With my new gear on, and a blow dried hair-do
But in my mind I knew I was sill
An old boiler

We danced all night long to a nice steady beat
But my hair went to frizz in the terrible heat
My mascara ran, and so did my tights
Confirming in my sight, I must be
An old boiler

So we came out this club, hot and sweaty
Because we'd been dancing all night
And he says to me "Well babe, what you doing then?"
"Well I think I might get a cab" I said casually
"Nah nah, come back to my place, I only live just round the corner
You can go home in the morning, yeah?"
"Well I don't think so, I've only known you a day, It' a bit soon innit
Give me a ring sometime yeah?"
But then he starts to get mad
"Listen here girl, I bought that gear you got on, I paid you in here tonight
I bought you all them drinks and you wanna go home, I should bleedin coco"
And then he stormed off

Well, I felt a right mug, well you would wouldn't you
So I ran after him, caught him up
And here we are walking down this street about a hundred miles per hour
Arm in arm, no talking, atmosphere you could have cut with a knife

There's no-one about, nothing to take your mind off it you know
No cars, not even the occasional stray animal
It was cold and the wind's whistling through the tree's
Blowing newspapers accross my legs so I tripped as I tried to keep up with him
And there was all these alleyways and railway bridges, the stink of piss

The all of a sudden he grabbed hold of my arm
And he starts to drag me up one of these alleyways
Then he starts to hit me really hard across the face, you know
He was hitting me and grabbing at me
It was awful because he was, like, so big
Hitting me he was, and tearing at my clothes
There was nothing I could do honest, I was helpless
And then he tried to rape me, and there was nothing I could do, honest
All I could do was scream

NOOOOOOOO!

NOO!

LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!

NOOOOO!!

NOOOOOO!!!!

NOOOO!!!

PLEASE STOP!!!

NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

(assorted screams, cries, and finallly, a sound resembling someone vomitting)

Sulphur on 26/6/2010 at 09:12

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Oh, just about everything from The Antlers' Hospice. There are very few things I've listened to that can claim to be as fuck-you-up depressing.

Bear:

There's a bear inside your stomach
The cub's been kicking from within
He's loud, though without vocal chords
We'll put an end to him
We'll make all the right appointments
No one ever has to know
And then tomorrow I'll turn 21
We'll script another show
We'll play charades up in the Chelsea
Drink champagne although you shouldn't be
We'll be blind and dumb until we fall asleep
None of our friends will come
They dodge our calls
And they have for quite a while now
It's not a shock
You don't seem to mind and I just can't see how

We're too old
We're not old, old at all
Just too old
We're not old, old at all

There's a bear inside your stomach
The cub's been kicking you for weeks
And if this isn't all a dream
Well then we'll cut him from beneath
Well we're not scared of making caves
Or finding food for him to eat
We're terrified of one another
And terrified of what that means
But we'll make only quick decisions
And you'll just keep my in the waiting room
And all the while I'll know we're fucked
And not getting unfucked soon
When we get home we're bigger strangers than we've ever been before
You sit in front of snowy television, suitcase on the floor

We're too old
We're not old, old at all
Just too old
We're not old, old at all
Just too old
We're not old, old at all
Just too old
We're not old, old at all
Just too old
We're not old, old at all
Just too old
We're not old, old, old, old at all

Two:

In the middle of the night I was sleeping sitting up
When a doctor came to tell me, "Enough is enough"

He brought me out into the hall (I could have sworn it was haunted)
And told me something that I didn't know that I wanted to hear:
That there was nothing that I could do to save you
The choir's going to sing, and this thing is going to kill you
Something in my throat made my next words shake
And something in the wires made the lightbulbs break
There was glass inside my feet and raining down from the ceiling
It opened up the scars that had just finished healing
It tore apart the canyon running down your femur
(I thought that it was beautiful, it made me a believer)
And as it opened I could hear you howling from your room
But I hid out in the hall until the hurricane blew
When I reappeared and tried to give you something for the pain
You came to hating me again and just sang your refrain

You had a new dream, it was more like a nightmare
You were just a little kid, and they cut your hair
Then they stuck you in machines, you came so close to dying
They should have listened, they thought that you were lying
Daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up
Built the gears in your head, now he greases them up
And no one paid attention when you just stopped eating
"Eighty-seven pounds!" and this all bears repeating

Tell me when you think that we became so unhappy
Wearing silver rings with nobody clapping
When we moved here together we were so disappointed
Sleeping out of tune with our dreams disjointed
It killed me to see you getting always rejected
But I didn't mind the things you threw, the phones I deflected
I didn't mind you blaming me for your mistakes
I just held you in the door-frame through all of the earthquakes
But you packed up your clothes in that bag every night
And I would try to grab your ankles (what a pitiful sight)
But after over a year, I stopped trying to stop you
From stomping out that door
Coming back like you always do
Well no one's going to fix it for us, no one can
You say that, "No one's going to listen, and no one understands"

So there's no open doors and there's no way to get through
There's no other witnesses, just us two

There's two people living in one small room
From your two half-families tearing at you
Two ways to tell the story (no one worries)
Two silver rings on our fingers in a hurry
Two people talking inside your brain
Two people believing that I'm the one to blame
Two different voices coming out of your mouth
While I'm too cold to care and too sick to shout

You had a new dream, it was more like a nightmare
You were just a little kid, and they cut your hair
Then they stuck you in machines, you came so close to dying
They should have listened, they thought that you were lying
Daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up
Built the gears in your head, now he greases them up
And no one paid attention when you just stopped eating
"Eighty-seven pounds!" and this all bears repeating


The ending song, 'Epilogue' has a lot of weight too, but it comes into absolutely razor-sharp focus only when you've heard the album from beginning to end.

Haplo on 26/6/2010 at 09:44

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Try Matkan Lopussa by Moonsorrow:

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xroAkah4QGw)

(http://www.darklyrics.com/lyrics/moonsorrow/kivenkantaja.html#6)