st.patrick on 11/12/2008 at 21:12
ffs bobby stop running around or I'll nail your other foot to the floor as well
RavynousHunter on 14/12/2008 at 17:45
How do you get an emo kid to stop being emo?
Kill him.
Kolya on 14/12/2008 at 20:25
Quote Posted by RavynousHunter
How do you get an emo kid to stop being emo?
Wind from ahead.
RavynousHunter on 14/12/2008 at 20:35
That works, too. :cheeky:
EvaUnit02 on 31/12/2008 at 12:12
I found this on another forum.
Quote:
him - Hey babe, do you know what Rohypnol is?
her - no?
him - Now you do.
thief0 on 20/1/2009 at 15:32
A joke written by some guy (kinda long, sorry):
"I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE:
One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'
I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'
We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier.'
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'
I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that B I T C H knows I'm smarter than her."
belboz on 21/1/2009 at 06:06
Whats black and spits.
A Baby in a frying pan.
Why do women have legs.
Have you seen the mess snails make.
What blue and lies in a corner.
A baby in a plastic bag.
Whats the difference between a lorry full of sand and a lorry full of babies.
You can't move sand with a pitchfork.
(lorry is uk word for truck)
Scots Taffer on 21/1/2009 at 06:12
Quote Posted by EvaUnit02
him - Hey babe, do you know what Rohypnol is?
her - no?
him - Now you do.
Would make more sense if he said "And you never will," as he pours it into her drink.
Also:
Inline Image:
http://img183.imageshack.us/img183/2921/whynotrg9.jpgfett on 10/8/2009 at 21:32
Quote Posted by Baccus
On that note: my grandfather died in Aushwitz. Poor fellow fell off a guard tower.
First time I lol'ed in this whole thread. :thumb:
Starrfall on 10/8/2009 at 21:36
Oh fett.
