metal dawn on 6/8/2006 at 02:13
"MY EEEEEEEYE WHAT HHHHELLL DID YOU DO TO MY EYE?
MOTHERFUUUU---"
*SQUISH*
-Silent ragings of a
Plant from the Maw of Chaos
.....
eh
RavynousHunter on 7/8/2006 at 15:53
Quote Posted by Poison Ivy
I'm becoming something of a thread-necromancer....
tch, im pretty sure in the first month of my being on the LGS forums, i couldve been described as a thread necro.
Ok some more down the pipe:
"Giveth unto the Builder thy greatest works, and thou shalt be rewarded. Giveth unto Him thy unfinished or shoddy works, then in thy shoe shalt he urinate."
--Hammer Book of Tenets, The Lost Chapters
"Oh hell, my bacon's on fire! Who put that fire crystal there? Who are you?! Guar---- *thwap*."
--Book of Servants
"If you see anyone who looks even the slightest bit odd, you shall scream at the top of your lungs, flail your arms about, and run head-first into the nearest wall as fast as you can."
--Servants' Guidebook, Ch.47, Paragraph 12, Sentence 34
"Permit anyone into our holy sanctuary even if his credentials art obvious fakes."
--Note on the wall of the Hammer Cathedral, 3 months prior to the loss of the Talisman
"Why art the Mechanists so evil? Because they doth have WOMEN in thier employ!"
--Brother Xander
"Now where in the hell is that damned spice I had stowed away, MY SOUP IS GETTING COLD!"
--Captain Davidson
"I swear, if I get one more concussion, I'm going to be sent away as a retard."
--City Watch Official
"Assume anyone on the ground is dead, even if they are obviously breathing."
--Guards' Manual, Ch 16, Paragraph 94, Sentence 12
"Eat me, for the love of the Builder, eat me."
--The Hammer Book of the Lonley Muffin
"What? This? Tis simply flour, I assure thee! And why is it upon mine nose? I didst ...ummm... stumble on the way to mine desk and mine head didst knock gainst it. What? What art THOU looking at?"
--The Smith-In-Exile, Prelude
"Why not accept Karras into our ranks? He tis a great inventor, despite his obvious homosexual pedophilia."
--Book of Karras
"There art no children amongst our ranks, then again, there art no women amongst us either."
--Brother Xandar
"I pray that there tis still a Holy Symbol and some Holy Water about, I am going to need a Ritual of Consecration after this..."
--Brother Murus, scrawled note found on a prostitute lying dead next to his corpse
:thumb:
Musopticon? on 8/8/2006 at 10:03
Right. :]
marshall banana on 9/8/2006 at 18:48
He was never the life and soul of the party.
And now he no longer has either
Early attempts to construct an automated wagon failed when a tree, that was not there before, got in the way
Here lies 'Ohhh, flashing red button...' - Tim
'I think therefore I am' were his last words. Yes, well, thinking you are a bird and leaping off that cliff didn't make you one
In memory of 'I will drink whatever you pour into my glass' - Irina
Within lies Wim Resurrected again, but alas a sniper-arrow wrapped with the note 'That's for closing my thread!' laid him low once more
--Book of gravestone engravings
Of course the water is deep enough to jump into from this height
And she said: 'No, no, no. You do it like this...
'I have a plan, I go ahead and see if they are still there...' Obviously they where
--Book of last words
FiveFingerDiscount on 21/8/2006 at 21:13
Feelest thou lucky, punk?
-From the teachings of Brother Harold the Dirty
Overlord Nexus on 22/8/2006 at 07:27
And it came to pass that Garrett did attempt to slay people in indirect ways, thereby hoping to avoid the Builder's wrath. But neither drowning them, nor dropping them from cliffs, grilling them over a slow fire, nor crushing them under elevators could circumvent the ban on murder.
---The Book of Utter, Utter Bastardry
So, I'm a deranged little fanatic with a laughable speech impediment and terrible taste in hats, am I? Who's laughing now? Me! Muahahahaha! What's that? Ha! You wouldn't be such a brown-noser if I didn't have an army of clanking killer robots, now would you? Muaaaahahahahahahaha!
---The Gloatings of Karras
AAAAGH! Bloody hammer! Hit the *%#! nail, damn you! Not my #*@% thumb! NAIL!
---The Lost Sayings of the Builder
nicked on 22/8/2006 at 18:03
"And didst the master builder say 'yea, verily shalt all my followers have to speakest in this ridiculous way, whilst all ye rest of thine world speaketh with total normality. Forthwith.'"
Overlord Nexus on 23/8/2006 at 11:45
"Is that a blackjack in your pocket, or are you happy to see me?"
---Basso's sister
nicked on 24/8/2006 at 18:53
"And so it came to pass that crime didst reach a record high in the city, on account of nobody wanting to be employed as a guard due to the high likelihood of permanent brain damage."
- The Book of the Blackjack
Lamb on 26/8/2006 at 05:22
Laws from the book of hammers:
Thou shalt not lie
Thou shalt not steal
Thou shalt not strike at thee enemy perched upon thy table
Thou shalt not take it upon thyself to relight torches
Thou shalt not enter water, for dirt and sweat is the badge of a busy worker
Thou shalt not be weary of queer happenings unless they happen under your watchfull eyes.
Deadbolts are the tool of the Trickster
