Please give me some advice.

Gussss on 30/5/2007 at 16:30

my heartfelt sympathies go out to you. I think theres nothing wrong with your daughter seeking refuge next to you (signs of a loving family). remember our kids feel very alone in this world & you need to be there for her. god forbid it would happen to me, but if it did i know my nine year old would also feel empty without her mom. in this case i say have patience, she will eventually go back to her own bed once her grieving process passes.

Once again my condolences.

Lost Soul on 30/5/2007 at 17:05

I am very sorry for you loss, I hope you and yours are doing well in the circumstances. With regard to your daughter, I cannot give any better advice than that which the good people on this forum have already given you. Be there for your daughter but also look after yourself aswell.
Once again you have my sincere condolences. Lost Soul.

Mr.Duck on 31/5/2007 at 07:01

Truly a damned shame, glslvrfan.

I doubt I could add anything of relevance than what has been said here by others, so I will simply wish you and your daughter the best of luck.

<3

Biohazard on 31/5/2007 at 07:14

You have my prayers tonight, glslvrfan.

jbairdjr on 1/6/2007 at 10:42

My condolonces on the loss of your loved one.

Shadow Creepr on 3/6/2007 at 08:14

My deepest condolences, glslvrfan. :(

Fragony on 3/6/2007 at 18:04

Kids understand more then they show. So sorry for you, good luck.

jtr7 on 4/6/2007 at 00:01

:( :( :( :( ....

Dia on 4/6/2007 at 00:41

You have my most sincere and heartfelt sympathy and condolences glslvrfan.

I agree with B'Arts that the sleeping arrangement is something that will need to be addressed eventually, but perhaps not for awhile yet. I also recommend counseling for both you and your daughter. (That's pretty much what helped me get through these past 11 mos. since my husband died suddenly in a freak accident last June 9th.) Both of you are going to be in shock for a few months to come and it really helps to have professional advice and support during that time when you're most fragile and vulnerable. Right now your daughter is naturally insecure after her mother's death; it's common for a child or young person to fear losing their remaining parent after such a trauma. Don't rush her - everyone travels through the different stages of grief at their own pace and remember that there is no right or wrong way to grieve.

Most importantly, rely on your own instincts and common sense. Don't allow any 'well meaning' family or friends rush you into something neither you or your daughter are ready for yet (such as said sleeping arrangements, packing away or getting rid of all of your wife's belongings, or selling your house or moving to a different location, etc). They really may mean well, but in the end, it's your decision and you need to go with whatever makes you and your daughter most comfortable. Take things slowly; one day at a time.

I'll be keeping you both in my thoughts and prayers. Take care.