Nocturne_98 on 6/3/2006 at 19:41
It was just another day at the office when a tall, thin blonde walked by. I could tell she was tall because my office is on the third floor. I could tell she was thin because she had to face my way to cast a shadow.
Ulukai on 6/3/2006 at 20:22
ZylonBane looked pitifully upon the thread, eyes like barely kindled pinpricks of apathy scanning so many dying coals that would surely soon go out.
demagogue on 6/3/2006 at 20:44
I can't find the English script for La Samurai.
I remember that having some great noirish lines.
Anyway, not a line but a little scene (obviously just as a joke here; I figured enough people would be flying off balconies ITT that it could use the irony) :
VINCENT
What did Marsellus do?
JULES
Sent a couple of guys over to his
place. They took him out on the
patio of his apartment, threw his
ass over the balcony. Nigger fell
four stories. They had this garden
at the bottom, enclosed in glass,
like one of them greenhouses --
nigger fell through that. Since
then, he's kinda developed a speech
impediment.
The elevator doors open, Jules and Vincent exit.
VINCENT
That's a damn shame.
Jonesy on 6/3/2006 at 21:01
Breakfast noir-"Without thinking, I crammed that deadly sliver of metal carrying the city's most infamous breakfast food into my maw. The tiny flakes snapped and popped, like the fingers of a mob snitch after they found 'im. It wasn't good cereal. But it was better than a gut fulla lead."
Aja on 6/3/2006 at 21:09
His question and his revolver were loaded, and both were pointed at me. They say it takes a crisis to reveal who you really are: fortunately I knew who I was. As I reached for my holster, I glanced out the window at the pouring rain. This dirty city didn't need more blood, but I sure as hell didn't need any less.Inline Image:
http://members.shaw.ca/dletersky/tracer.jpgMortal Monkey on 6/3/2006 at 21:24
Okay Aja wins THREAD OVER
Scots Taffer on 7/3/2006 at 00:16
It's a tie so far for my favourite between:
Quote Posted by Low Moral Fiber
Another dame with sob stories to tell and sleepless nights to give, Traci had red lips and pale blue eyes, like a smurf genocide.
Quote Posted by Starrfall
I had a feeling I was going to regret taking the job, but when you've got a bookie with the temperment of a retarded pitbull, hands like sides of beef and an eyebrow ridge you could set your lowball on, money is money.
Noid gets pipped at the post by Starrfall's excellent brutish thug description (what's a lowball though?).
Quote Posted by Tonamel
I don't think anything I could come up with would ever top "Snow fell like confetti on the devil's parade."
The writers for Max Payne were singularly excellent at spoofing a genre which I think was already half-ripe in parody. Some of the language used in the ingame comics are fantastic.
I thought I'd throw in another half-hearted attempt:
The city only truly came to life at night; its streets coursed with cheap hookers, pimps and drug pushers like infected blood pumping through the arteries of a heart so black and corrupted, it could only belong to Satan himself.And why not another:
It came to me like a thunderbolt that Candy was faker than press on nails, her lipstick shined like an oil slick and her eyes told a million lies; my brain was so steeped in the cocktail of chemicals from the mickey she'd slipped into my bourbon, it was all I could do to leer at her cleavage before someone put out the lights.Printer's Devil on 7/3/2006 at 01:51
A "lowball" is a type of short glass (about 4" high, 3" diameter) used for drinking hard liquor, either straight or "on the rocks". It's taller cousin is the "highball" (about 6" high, 2" diameter), which is often used for mixed drinks. Cheap whiskey is the poison of choice for most noir protagonists.
Scots Taffer on 7/3/2006 at 02:02
Ah okay, do they also come in square designs? If so, I used to be fascinated by these when I was younger and used to draw them constantly.
MsLedd on 7/3/2006 at 02:14
The knock on the door was almost inviting, the hall lamps painting a soft silhouette that shined through the greasy paned door to slide seductively across the floor of my room. If I opened the door, there'd be no turning back. What choice did I have? Ratchet always said "Sooner or later kid, everybody's bill come due."
