37637598 on 2/4/2010 at 06:28

---

I feel for you Duck, I frequently smile at the people around me, then turn my head to silently sigh. For me, it's distance from friends and family. I have an amazing job and plenty of money, but I had to sacrifice everyone and everything i've ever known because of it, my entire life simply vanished in a day 6 months ago and I haven't made contact with it since, except a few calls to the parents. I've learned that no amount of money can replace or replicate the joy of friends and loved ones company. I don't regret putting myself in this situation, but I am completely lonley because of it. I often feel like running away back home to find the new beginning that's not even there, leaving myself broke, unsuccessful, and happy.

Maybe a hobbie could help you get through the emotional chaos? Back when I had a life, I had about 20 hobbies, I was poor, in debt, but I was the happiest I've ever been.

Mr.Duck on 2/4/2010 at 16:58

---

It's not, Nicker.

I never kid about me, specially if I'm sharing myself, something I rarely do.

The date when I posted this thread is merely a coincidence.

Thief13x on 2/4/2010 at 22:59

---

Damn dude, do I feel ya, I'm in a very similar situation and pretty unhappy.

scumble on 3/4/2010 at 08:53

---

I would say that does help me in some ways as well, but I've got both of them on my lap right now while trying to type, and that isn't particularly helpful...

I am not actually depressed though. You have struck a bit of a chord here Duckeh. I am also feeling just tired a lot of the time, but I've had a fair bit to contend with over the last year. My grandfather died, my grandmother found she couldn't afford to live in her own house, and there has been a lot of family reshuffling which means we are all better off but it meant moving house again and some major upheaval.

What annoys me about all this is the amount of wasted time, money and energy in me moving further away from home to be closer to my current job in London, but we could never have foreseen that my grandfather had so little time left. It true that I may be back to a long commute, but living in the middle of London's endless suburban sprawl was just tiring in itself. 2009 was just an awful year.

I have at least got somewhere, but when you get older things just seem to wear you down, especially if you have kids. You love them but they tire you out and you wonder where all your time went. Lately I have put much more energy into my career, largely because I'm actually expected to do some work, and it is interesting, but the overall framework of life makes me tired. The "normal" way of life of working hard at a job to earn a living is tiring. I see it everywhere on the trains. What the hell are we all doing, I ask myself.

I haven't given up on working towards earning a living from home or reducing my need to be working full time all the time, but the tiredness doesn't make it any easier. How does one get of one's arse and really make things move?

Well, perhaps you were thinking more generally Duck, about the state of the world and things. At the moment I don't read the news or watch television, except for Cbeebies when forced by proximity to the children. If you watch Cbeebies for long enough you start to think that the world might not be so bad (apart from the fact that children's tv presenters exist). Also, if I am going to read something I look for substantial things rather than shallow articles or entertainment, or something that might actually make a difference to my life and those I care about.



I hope you can reverse that trend before too long - whatever this job is there can be a way to use the skills you are learning and money you are hopefully saving to become less dependent on moving to a location for a job. I'm very mindful to attempt to avoid letting a career path take over my life in the long term.

Mr.Duck on 3/4/2010 at 16:16

---

*Messes everyone's hair in the thread and gives'em some cookies*