BrokenArts on 8/2/2008 at 19:49

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Congrats Shayde!!! :D Hopefully your morning sickness will pass soon enough. I had very little of it, thank god.

There are so many things to cover, if you love your family, when the kids are born, you take it day by day. Talk to the people that surround you, if you have serious questions.

During the pregnancy, never say never. I was supposed to go through the natural child birth route, and all that. It didn't workout that way. My daughter wouldn't turn, she did late in the pregnancy. Her constantly resting on my hips at 8.5 months pregnant, I ended up walking with a limp, it hurt.

Ended up having an emergency C-section, the hubby now ex at that time, they wouldn't allow him in the operating room. They put me under and had to get her out ASAP. We almost lost her, cord was wrapped around her shoulder and her neck, I wasn't not progressing, and her heart rate started dropping suddenly.
GET HER OUT NOW! I was having an Oh shit moment, scared to death.

Not trying to scare you Carini, each pregnancy is different, just be prepared for whatever life brings you.

So many topics to cover, just be the best father you can be, try not to stress too much, have patience, understanding, your life will change forever, for the better. Remember to always talk to your wife, be there for one another.

Out in public, have bottles, or boob handy, for the feedings.
For god sake, keep the kids busy when they get older. Having screaming brats run around the store, restaurant, in my eyes is not exceptable, shows a lazy parent. Give them something to do! Bring something to color with, books, etc. Tell them what you expect of them, make it know to them. My daughter one time started to fuss, I looked at her and said, "You wanna leave the store?" No she replied, that was that. I don't tolerate bad behavior like that.

nickie - sorry! didn't know you back then. :p ;)

Carini on 8/2/2008 at 20:15

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Sup pregnant buddy. :cool: We're 16 weeks next Monday.

Thanks for all the advice and kind words BA! We are going to go the midwife route and we were told that if it isn't anything but a smooth labor/delivery they ship you off to the hospital just in case. So I'll be ready.

Sinister, they said I can "catch". I had a friend go to this midwife and he helped deliver. I think I might want to stay North of the equator though the whole blood thing makes me woosie. I told one of the nurses that and she smiled and said "don't worry we'll have the smelling salts ready"

the_grip on 8/2/2008 at 22:09

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Good call with the midwife. That's what we did for both of ours, although our hospital allows midwives so we delivered in the hospital a la natural.

If you need to speed up labor, i'm not kidding when i say nipple stimulation is better than pitocin. We did that with our last when my wife was not in labor, and within an hour she delivered. It sounds crazy, but it works.

Turtle on 9/2/2008 at 00:57

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Good on you for not pussing out.

Scots Taffer on 9/2/2008 at 02:47

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You have my congratulations and commiserations (on the puking), Shayde.



Essentially what I was going to say in my own way. There were periods where I thought "holy shit what if this kid hates me" and "what if we never sleep again" and "how are we going to cope with no family a bazillion miles from home", but mostly I was excited and when Evelyn was born, pure distilled joy. The moment you hold your child in your arms for the first time, somehow everything pales and you really feel stripped to your core.

Ever since it's been great; sure, there are times when it can be tiring, maddening and even quite daunting (especially when she's a few months old, you're managing your wife's hormones, your young child, trying to hold down your relatively new job and keep a house in order - with no family!) but there are infinitely more moments were your child doing the simplest things will give you a silly shit-eating grin. And I mean, this doesn't make you "That Dad" who wants to go around saying HERE'S MY DAUGHTER AT SEVEN AND A HALF WEEKS I'M PRETTY SURE SHE'S TOP OF HER RESPECTIVE CLASS OF INFANT INTELLIGENCE or going all papa internet with photos at her 1wk old and 2wks old... but you can be a really proud and loving parent in your own household without becoming "that guy".

I really advise getting as much paternity leave as you can afford to take to help during the initial transition of your wife and child coming home, integrating into a routine will be one of the hardest parts of having a child but I advocate sticking as closely to a routine as you and your child can manage. We got advice at the very beginning that helped us immeasurably, this midwife got a cold washcloth and wiped Evelyn's face to wake her up for a feeding and told us "she'll sleep as long you let her and she'll wake up for food whenever she's hungry, unless you try to make her sleep and eat at the right times". Now of course, Evie cried getting woken up with a cold washcloth and another new parent nearby almost burst into tears saying "I can't do that!" (same woman burst into tears when we got shown how to bathe the baby properly, I guess she was just an emotional wreck). But I advise you TO DO IT, because trust me, when your baby is sleeping through the night save for a feeding session or two, you'll be glad you were tough on the routine early.

Also, never underestimate how emotional/hormonal your wife can get post-birth, it does weird shit to their bodies and to their disposition. Endeavour to be understanding.



Who the fuck doesn't? That was an awesome little surprise first time I was getting at the wife post-birth, not that I wasn't partially expecting it.

Got Milk? :cool: