Ajare on 28/1/2005 at 19:14
As promised...
Went quickly through training, but my over-conservative nature meant that I spent rather longer on the last task than was probably necessary. I'm sure I wasn't the only one to say 'I don't believe it! Thermoptic camoflage!', either.
Agent Denton is now qualified for operations in the field. These include strimming, herding sheep and fixing that rotting fence post down by the stream. He has decided to specialise in pistols and heavy weapons, with a hopefully lucrative sideline in picking doors open.
Liberty Island
A brief chat with Paul on the docks, and then it's straight into action. He charges up towards the Statue of Liberty. An evil NSF troop, possibly Canadian, charges past him and tries to take on the bot that's patrolling the docks. He soon returns in various pieces.
JC finds some pepper. And so, the hunt for pasta is on. Unfortunately, it seems that in the future everything is some dumb soy compound. The NSF troops seem to be very fond of knives, which is a shame because JC DOESN'T WANT THEM!! SERIOUSLY IF HE HAS TO PICK UP AND THEN DISCARD ANOTHER KNIFE HE'S GOING TO SHOVE THE PEPPER UP THE NEXT NSF's BACKSIDE!! And he always thought that the 'ring of fire' was the name given to the series of volcanoes lining the pacific rim.
He rescues Gunther from the dark dungeon with his Lockpick of Lockpicking +1. Gunther is impressed, and demands a firearm, which JC hands over, because he suspects Gunther will ask him to pick up the soap if he doesn't. Then it's upstairs, and a peaceful surrender for the NSF commander. Now JC just needs to find another pistol. He has a GEP gun from Paul, but no ammo for it. And batons don't impress anybody. Good for twirling though, when JC feels like expressing his more feminine side.
JC decides that he wants to climb over the outer walls, so spends an hour and a half stacking boxes in a clever double-helix shape. He also lines up lots of dead NSF for an Abu Ghraib style shot for the boys back at HQ. He then discovers that he could have just swum round to the other side of the wall. Oh well....
UNATCO HQ
So, the ammo lockup code is 0451? All is right with the world....
JC takes Private Lloyd's soda, because he is thirsty. "I don't understand, what are you doing?" asks the bewildered soldier. With intelligence like that, I can see why they made you receptionist, Private. JC takes a strong dislike to him. He meets Shannon in the women's restroom, but she doesn't seem very happy about it. Nor does Manderley, but then he probably spies on the men's restroom, with one of those 'toilet-cams' that the Japanese are so fond of. So, it's off to the next mission with a baton, a GEP gun (no ammo) and some pepper.
Castle Clinton
JC bribes some kid with a chocolate bar, and finds a pistol! He takes down an NSF and bags a flamethrower for his troubles. The ambrosia is located, and he gets out. Anna is very pleased at the bodycount. But what's this, a hostage situation in the subway? Three NSF are taken out with one rocket, and then he sneaks down the steaming vent and tells the hostages to make a break for it. Hostages safe in the train, he hits the TNT, taking out all the terrorists and his right leg. On to Hell's Kitchen.
Hell's Kitchen
There's a big firefight in the park, and JC takes down a bunch of NSF. The door to Osgood's is open so he takes a look about. Hmm, should probably come back here later. Over to the 'Ton, terrorists are taken out, woman is very happy but no offers of sex are forthcoming, so quickly raid Paul's room, and over to Underworld, giving a pimp a quick bashing on the way. JC takes out his gun in the Underworld, and people start running away. When they realise that it was only his gun that he took out, they calm down a bit. JC annoys the barmaid by asking about her augmentations. Off to the Free Clinic!
2000 for using a medbot? Yeah right. Talk to all the bums. Off to Smuggler's. He tries to rip JC off, so JC gets even with him by rescuing his friend, Ford Schick. Now he's got to charge a little less. Still a complete rip-off, though. JC finds the generator, sets the alarm off, and goes on a GEP gun rampage. The transmittor is destroyed, and Agent Hermann is disappointed not to have got in on the action.
UNATCO HQ
JC goes and talks to Shannon. They're really getting along well. He follows Simons down into the interrogation chamber. It seems that augmented agents are incapable of walking backwards, when performing simple tasks such as opening doors, they always have to run. JC tries to tranq Manderley, but it doesn't work. Manderley kills him, and JC falls down dead in the doorway. Meanwhile the tranq darts seem to be having an effect because Manderley keeps on sitting down and standing up while saying 'oof!' a lot. Agent Navarre comes running in and closes the door, cutting JC in half. "He has run off - a wise move", she sagely declares. A quick reload, and it's off to the chopper. JC tries to tranq Private Lloyd, but it doesn't work either. Oh well.
Airfield Hunt
JC interrogates a child in Battery Park, who wants to know whether he is a cop or not. JC goes to put his gun away, so as not to scare the kid, but instead presses the trigger. These things happen. Everyone goes wild, and starts running around. Agent Denton talks to some guy, but he wants a password, so he heads down to the subway station, where a Mr Filben sells him the password for c500. A quick return trip, a usage of the phone and on to Brooklyn Station.
Talk to Charlie, talk to Rooks, kill Rock, unblock valve, onto Mole Hideout, sneak along, chat to people, find secret entrance, up to restrooms, onto airfield. Deus Ex, the succinct way.
At the helibase, JC takes out the NSF and heads over to the water cooler for a drink. Having lockpick skill allows him to get into lots of locked places and find very little of use. He drops down from the helicopter and runs for the elevator, taking a few hits on the way.
At the airfield, he sneaks around to the boathouse, carefully avoiding the bots. Argh, a guy with a flamethrower! Good thing there's a lot of water nearby. Meanwhile the trooper runs off and activates the alarm. Oh well. A short time later he is in the barracks, and takes everyone out. There is a weapons-stash behind the staircase. Onto the hangar....
So, Paul's NSF? A twist that rivals the ending of Planet Of The Apes, to be sure. Utterly impossible to guess. Speaks to Lebedev, and then Anna arrives. Who to kill? Hmmm.
UNATCO HQ
JC sees Shannon again. She's great. Alex is a bit worried, but intrigued. Simons is rather annoyed by JC's constant bugging. Manderley isn't too happy, either, but Carter seems pretty relaxed. JC waves goodbye to Private Lloyd, and sets off for Hong Kong.
Hell's Kitchen
Well, the initials were close enough. JC meets Paul in his room. The couple next door seem to be having fun, but all attempts to gain entry are futile. He speaks to the Dentons, and then kills 'that Jojo punk'. The broadcast is sent, and then it's back to Paul via the Underworld. The barmaid attacks JC, so he stuns her and dumps her body by the subway entrance.
At Paul's place they are ambushed, but JC valiantly hides in the closet while Paul takes care of the MiBs, and then makes a mad dash out the front of the hotel with the aid of a few gas grenades. He drops down into the underground tunnels, and surfaces next to the subway station. Picks up the body of the barmaid, and off to Battery Park, where he is captured by Gunther.
MJ12 Facility
Jc's stuff has been taken! But, he's still got the barmaid. He slowly makes his way to the armoury, and regains his stuff. On the way to find Paul, he bumps into a white man speaking with an Afro-Carribean accent. He seems to be a doctor. Odd. He lets the Karkians loose and watches them dispatch two troopers, a secretary and some hapless doctor. He lets the greasels loose too, but quickly regrets it. Damn greasels.
UNATCO HQ
JC speaks to Alex, tells Jaime to join him and then speaks to Sam. Manderley is not happy to see him, and is soon disposed of. Simons seems unpeturbed. He kills Janice, too, because her accent annoys him. He then finds out that Shannon is the ammo thief! She then has the cheek to try to sell it to him. The world is thus minus one Shannon. It strikes JC that the vast majority of non-essential kills have been women. Is he really that misogynist? He vows to kill lots of children to make up for it. Ah, here's an opportunity, it's Private Lloyd! For once he's not happy to see JC, so JC institutes his 'kill-anything-but-women' policy. A message from the Comedy Legend (aka Gunther). He's not happy that JC blew Agent Navarre to pieces with LAMs on the 747. Oh well. Off to the Hong to the Kong.
Deiyen on 29/1/2005 at 01:25
:laff: This is great! Hilarious! Keep it up, I can't wait to hear the rest of it. :thumb:
Btw, what'd you end up doing with Jordan Shea? Did the karkians eat her?
Ajare on 29/1/2005 at 17:00
Quote Posted by Deiyen
Btw, what'd you end up doing with Jordan Shea? Did the karkians eat her?
Which one is she?
Hong KongTrapped, eh? JC gets into control room #1, logs on with TALON/SKYEYE, and set the turrets on the roof to kill the troopers. They die in a satisfying way. He crawls around some ducts, taking out one bot with a LAM, and EMPing another.
Wan-Chai MarketJC follows some small kid around, who seems to be trying to extort protection money from some equally annoying news vendor. He talks to Mr Quick, and then sets off to find Maggie. On the way he stuns the little brat, and dumps the body in the canal.
Queen's TowerThe maid is quite stunned to see JC, literally, ahaha...haha.........ha. He talks to Maggie, who seems quite reasonable. JC manages to 'run over' one of her cats. He dumps the maid upstairs, in case her body is discovered, and hacks into a security terminal. What's this? Bad Miss Chow! Bad! How many times do I have to tell you that cutting the finger off a Triad leader and stealing his sword is the wrong thing to do! However, Agent Denton decides to let her live for the time being. He picks up the sword after hitting his head on a lantern. It seems a little over-powered, but he's not complaining. Listens to what that nice man Mr Simons has to say, and then heads back to deal with Maggie. She's gone. Oh well. He throws the maid out of the window.
Lucky Money ClubNow that's JC's kind of door-staff! Tall, muscular and holding a big gun! He really wishes that dumb girl would stop coming onto him, though. Two Aussie blaggers try to get him to pay for their entry: apparently they spent all their money on shrimps to throw onto the barby. Strewth! Given their appalling fake accents, they're almost certainly lying, so no entry for them! The dark-haired one calls JC a loser, so JC prods her. A chinese policeman starts attacking JC, so JC kills him. Ooops. Everyone in the club starts running. Oh well. JC finds some Russian sailors, and takes out his GEP gun. Everyone starts running again. Ooops, didn't mean to press 'fire'. Damn itchy trigger finger. The remains of four people lie in front of JC. Four policemen approach. He runs to the doorgirl, ducks behind her, closes his eyes and presses 'fire'. There is blood all over the place, JC is missing both legs and an arm, but there are no policeman (or doorgirl, or bouncer) in sight. He finds Max, and talks to him. There's a raid by MJ12 commandos (all two of them). On the way out the Chinese police attack him again, but some poor girl gets caught in the crossfire, so JC uses her as a shield while he runs back to the market. Gordon isn't happy that JC drowned Louis in the canal, and says he would kill me, but he also says that JC is the man he hoped he would be.
Tracer Tong's CompoundJC talks to Tracer, Alex, deactivates the killswitch, yadda-yadda, and heads off to VersaLife.
VersaLifeThe receptionist tells JC to find Mr Hundley doing his rounds. On the top floor, a disgruntled employee asks JC to kill Hundley, so he does. That's a controversial way of getting 150 points for 'character interaction'. Down to the MJ12 labs....
JC opens up the ramp under the statue, and heads on down. Ah, so that's where Maggie went. The security here is a little strange. The WiBs are wearing high-heels, not the most practical footwear. Actually, they'd be a lot more dangerous if they wore dragon's teeth on their feet and carried stilettos as melee weapons. The MiBs on the other hand, favour flamers in close quarters, in labs probably brimming full of flammable and explosive substances. This is no internet forum, people could get hurt! There's quite a lot of potential for mischief here, especially as no-one has twigged that JC is actually not on their side. He releases some aliens, and a tramp. The aliens kill Dr Kohl. The tramp runs around shouting 'weee, I'm free!'. Lots of troopers storm after him. He runs upstairs, JC following, where he is gunned down. JC returns downstairs to find blood and gibs all over the place, and no sign of either aliens or MiBs. Utter chaos. So he lets the greasels out. Bloody mistake, damn greasels! But they do look amusing, hopping around and causing mayhem. An MiB appears and flames one, inadvertantly setting two scientists on fire. See, I told you so! Good stuff. JC picks up lots of nice augs, and sword schematics, and gets the smell out of there.
Wan-Chai MarketJC speaks to Tracer to the T, meets the Triad leaders in the temple, and again in the Lucky Money. The police are still trying to kill him. He flames them, stuns Ling who is following him all over the place, meets Max and Gordon, stuns Ling again, and heads back to VersaLife.
VersaLifeJC climbs in via a disused railway. He takes out a commando and a scientist, and then makes his way down to the Universal Constructor. Ah, it's Maggie. Hello down there! He is very tempted to take her out from long-range with his GEP gun, but decides that he should hear her out. Some quick Dragon's Tooth on Dragon's Tooth action, and Miss Chow is greasel chow.
Tracer Tong's CompoundJC speaks with Paul, Alex, Jaime and finally Tracer. Back to Hell's Kitchen.
Hell's KitchenJC meets up with Harley and Vinny. He can't be bothered to kill Joe Greene. He finds Stanton, but Stanton doesn't want to talk to him, so JC stuns him. Mr Dowd wobbles about, and then runs around for a while. He's willing to talk now. Off to the harbour.
Wall CloudJC is suddenly overcome by pangs of guilt after reading the email that the captain got from his daughter. He then realises that the daughter is Ling, and doesn't feel so guilty any more. The ship is sent to Davy Jones's Locker.
CemetaryJC meets with Dowd, but has forgotten to get him any ambrosia. Some nice plot developments, and then a rather large number of troops appear. Time for some thermoptic camoflage (JC still doesn't believe it), and it's off to Gay Paris!*
*Not all of Paris is gay. Only the 20ieme Arrondissement. And the Tour Eiffel.
Ajare on 29/1/2005 at 21:04
Paris
JC takes out his GEP gun, and 'snipes' a bot from the roof of the building. It goes down after two direct hits. He hops down the lift and talks to the crazy woman, 'accidentally' running over a few cats on the way. The greasels are dealt with, thanks to the wonderful regeneration aug, and then onto the streets. He takes out the three commandos, and enters building 14. The phone rings - it's for him. He picks up the receiver and finds himself aboard a wierd craft with wires sticking out the back of his nec--- wait, it's just some stalker trying to scare him. Exciting stuff, down to the catacombs!
Catacombs
Absolute chaos as JC tries to rescue the hostages. This is the third hostage situation, so you'd have thought he'd know how to handle things by now. He takes out a commando with his pistol. A flamer gets him from behind, and the next minute is spent running around wildly, not able to see a thing, trying to take out the troops and the other commando, with his flamethrower, Dragon's Tooth and several LAMs. There's a pool of water nearby which he is trying to find, it's a good thing that his Regen aug is maxed out. 40 points a second, sweet. Eventually everyone is dead, but JC is still on fire and still cannot see the water. Eventually the flames wear off. He takes out the last two commandos and the WiB. But, now he has no Bio-Energy left! Oh wait, he has about 30 bio-cells, that'll do. The hostages are rescued, and it's off to the Champs-Elysee. He finds the sewers and uses some thermoptic camoflage to escape to the club.
La Porte de l'Enfer
Agent Denton sneaks in via the back, meets with a 'friend' of Nicolette, meets Nicolette outside (he never saw that one coming), and then it's off to the chateau.
DuClare Chateau
Nicolette seems very keen to let him know where she lost her virginity, but JC isn't interested. He has more important things on his mind, like Nuke Cola. He breaks in through the back entrance, finds the keys to the cellar, sends the meetings signal and makes his way through an eerie maze to get to the cathedral.
Cathedral
"You are a small, prowling mouse. And dumb like a mouse." JC has never laughed so hard before. He takes a serious pounding from the commando by the altar, draining all his BE in healing. He laments the fact that his motor neurones are driven by a laptop touchpad, controlled by a drunkard. One rocket take care of Gunther, and he doffs his imaginary cap at the passing of a comedy legend. Uplink established, Simons heckled, and it's time to split.
Everett's Base
Alex seems to be stalking JC. In return, JC kills Lucius Sweet, and then sets off to Vandenberg, having dealt with a suspicious-looking mechanic first. Bomb, indeed.
Van Denberg, party place
A couple of bots are dispatched with LAMs. JC has ten of the damn things, and can't carry any more. He also has twenty multi-tools. Down on the ground floor, he manages to walk through the outer walls of the base, for some reason. He decides that the flamethrower is taking up too much space, and isn't really being used much, so he ditches it. The floating body in the submerged generator room is very creepy, and JC is reminded of how much he hates spiderbots. He finally gets into the computer room. So, Daedalus + Icarus = Helios? Another damn hostage situation - the fourth.
Gas-U-Like Station
No problems, here. The regeneration aug proves its worth once again.
Ocean Base
Those big screen-shaking bots are cool. A scientist tells JC to mind his own business, this after having given JC his own login. JC prods him, and makes his way to the mini-submersible.
Ocean Lab
'The transgenics have probably sprung their cages'. That's a shock to the system. The greasels are actually somewhat easier than imagined, courtesy of the Dragon's Tooth and a few LAMs. A LAM or two also takes care of that damn huge spiderbot. And at last, a chance to use radar transparency, in getting past a couple of turrets.
JC bumps into Simons on the way back, and the customary headless-chicken mayhem ensues, as JC runs around, screen completely white, regen aug and energy shield running overtime. Finally he gets a good whack in with the 'Tooth. A frogman on the way back takes two hits, one more than Simons. And now, it's time to defuse a bomb. Hooray for irritating distractions.
Missile Silo
Why don't dogs spot you until you're right by them? Howard Strong takes a rocket to the face.
Area 51
The bunker is easily breached, thanks to a convenient terminal in a sniper tower. Radar transparency sees JC past a couple of bots. He gets messages from Everett, Tong and Helios, and goes to meet Helios in the Aquinas Hub. Three commandos arrive, and Helios sends out a couple of sentry drones to protect JC. JC, on the other hand, just thinks, 'screw it', engages the regen aug, and dives in head-first with his Dragon's Tooth. He's running out of 10mm ammo and rockets, you see. Onto sector 4, hello Bob! Helios uplinks established, reactor things purged, blue fusion things shut down, and it's game over.
Deiyen on 29/1/2005 at 23:42
\o/ Hooray! :D
Jordan Shea is the bartendress at the Underworld Tavern in New York.
Ajare on 30/1/2005 at 16:47
Quote Posted by Deiyen
Jordan Shea is the bartendress at the Underworld Tavern in New York.
Oh, her. I just left her somewhere in the MJ12 facility. I was going to carry her around for a bit, but couldn't really be bothered.
hayaku on 30/1/2005 at 23:58
hahahhaha, that was really funny... thanks for the laugh!!
keep up the good work.
TheNightTerror on 31/1/2005 at 03:21
:laff::laff::laff: So Canadians are evil, eh? ;) I laughed my ass off, you're a genius when it comes to comedy! :thumb:
Ultraviolet on 31/1/2005 at 04:33
Quote Posted by TheNightTerror
:laff::laff::laff: So Canadians are evil, eh? ;) I laughed my ass off, you're a genius when it comes to comedy! :thumb:
Wait, you didn't know?
Oh my god. I think she's one of THEM.
TheNightTerror on 31/1/2005 at 05:36
Perhaps I am. :devil:
