Curiosity strikes - other voluntary childless people here?

Chade on 9/7/2009 at 21:47

I'm not so sure about people deciding they "wouldn't make good parents".

I mean, if you would like to have kids, but don't do it because you are worried about not being a "good enough" parent, the my guess is that you are probably wrong. If you care that much, chances are you'll make a great parent!

All those "character flaws" you think you have will be beaten out of you in the first year with the iron bar of forced dedication, anyway. No one is ever completely ready to be a parent. Everyone learns (or grows up) "on the job", in one way or another.

(Of course, if people are saying "I wouldn't be a good parent" as an excuse to avoid having kids in the first place, then that's fine!)

Scots Taffer on 9/7/2009 at 22:54

Quote Posted by Vasquez

THAT'S WHAT I WAS TRYING TO POINT OUT TO ARMASTER WITH MY EXAMPLE (and my post even had a ;) to clarify things for the more thick-headed ones), WHOSE VENOM-FILLED AND ALLROUND-GENERALISING POST YOU SEEMED TO COMPLETELY OVERLOOK AND INSTEAD FOCUSED ON BLAMING ME FOR GENERALISING.

Fuck, have you lost the ability to understand what you read? Or is my English that bad?

I quite simply stepped over AR Master's mess of a post without commenting on it because, like I already fucking said several times now: stereotypes in both directions are stupid and you/others were already attacking AR's post.

I was trying to have a reasonable discussion with the person who started the thread - who, incidentally, used the first opportunity to lump me in with AR's bile.

Could you not read in between the lines of "stereotypes in both directions are stupid", or do I really have to specifically say "not all childless couples are x, y, x" even if I never accused them of being x, y, z in the first place?
It's a stereotype that's wrong and hurtful, of course I agree with that - that's kind of implied when I suggest THAT THEY ARE FUCKING STUPID.

edit: so yeah, if the end of all this is that we're agreeing on the fact that stereotypes are dumb then good talk, let's do this again sometime. (in fact, let's not)

Starrfall on 9/7/2009 at 22:56

now kids

DDL on 10/7/2009 at 00:47

Quote Posted by Chade

What if we LIKE the character flaws?

I mean, character flaws are a pretty key determinant of who you are, so perhaps "waiting until suitably set-up such that child rearing can be combined with the minimum of inherent personality sacrifice" isn't an entirely invalid argument.

I mean, if I had kids now, I'd still give them the best care and attention I could (woefully set up for it though I am), but FUCK, it'd be a sacrifice. And...well, I don't want to have kids and then end up resenting them for fucking up my life, after all.

(for the record: want kids eventually, but currently consider myself entirely unsuited to raising them)

Scots Taffer on 10/7/2009 at 00:48

daniel day lewis??

Chade on 10/7/2009 at 01:09

Quote Posted by DDL

I mean, if I had kids now, I'd still give them the best care and attention I could (woefully set up for it though I am), but FUCK, it'd be a sacrifice. And...well, I don't want to have kids and then end up resenting them for fucking up my life, after all.

Meh, I think we're arguing over semantics.

So you don't want kids now ... that's cool. But obviously you think that you're capable of doing so. I'm just saying that everyone who cares enough about raising kids to seriously doubt their ability to do so is exactly the sort of person who would make a good parent. If that's what they want.

Shug on 10/7/2009 at 01:32

Just popping in to say Vas was like a mother to me before she decided to cast me out of her life :(

fett on 10/7/2009 at 02:23

Quote Posted by mol

I'm just not the parent type. Clearly. With this laundry list of character defects, all the mistakes I've made, largely public.
Inner voice: Just stick to the cards.

i see what u did there

mol on 10/7/2009 at 07:12

Quote Posted by fett

i see what u did there

I'm bloody glad that at least someone did.

mol on 10/7/2009 at 07:23

Quote Posted by AR Master

Birthrates in the Western world are far below the replenishing standard; we're not even breaking even. I suppose it is the inevidible end to an increasingly materialist culture, if you stay single and childless until you die you'll have a much higher quality of life and you can sleep around with anyone you want. really what is the utility of marriage and children to someone who lives to consume.

To be honest I find the "childfree" attitude an unattractive, anti-social extremism, but it's your life

Just what the bleeding fuck are you on about? You certainly win the thread with the most self righteous, pompous, offensive, arrogant and clueless post yet.

Just get the fuck out.