Vasquez on 8/7/2009 at 14:06
Ok, since Scots and AR seemingly didn't get what my point really was, I'll say it again:
Quote Posted by Vasquez
Of course, the real truth is that how you consume, how much you sleep around, do you have alcohol/drug problems or are you an absolutist, are you an utter, selfish asshole or not - none of that has anything to do with whether you have/want kids or not.
And AR, if you wonder why childfree people seem to be sometimes thinking up good things to say about choosing childlessness, that's because many of us meet people like you face to face IRL - people who take this once aspect of our lives to conclude we're all-round superselfish, all about career, money and free sex, unnatural child-hating hags, sometimes also barren, bitter spinsters and/or man-hating lesbians.
(Yes, it's mostly the childfree women who get all the prying and bashing, not the men.)
Also, people who have kids are almost never asked WHY? But we get that all the time, even though the real answer for many, if not most, voluntary childless is simply: "Because I don't feel I want to", not "Well you see I'd love to have kids, but I rather choose to make shitloads of money and paint my nails all day and fly to Caribbean whenever I want to".
So I guess you can see why we sometimes want to discuss this openly, and also meet other people who have made the same choice? ;)
Renault on 8/7/2009 at 14:07
I know it's hardwired into all of us to some degree, but I think some people have kids just because they think that's what we're here to do, that it's an obligation as a human being or something. That's a really awful reason to have them, imo. My wife and I are 40, we tried for a while, but at one point realized we just were rather indifferent. Sometimes I wonder if as I get older, I'll regret the decision to not pursue parenthood more, but for now I'm comfortable with it.
At the very least, it should be "to each their own" regarding opinions in this area, which make the little above outburst by AR to me just perplexing (despite his weak attempts at explaining his "rage"). I roomed with a guy who had a vasectomy at age 25, because he just knew he didn't have any interest in having kids. Maybe he had a shitty childhood or whatever, but it was his choice, so why question it?
Kolya on 8/7/2009 at 14:11
It's interesting how all the voluntarily childless people emphasize how much they just love kids.
And then they hear a child crying at the supermarket and hate it, hate the parents and ooze in their superior decision to keep on staying egotists for the rest of their lives.
AR is right. You're the anti-social crotchspawn of capitalism, worse than Hitler (who loved children).
PigLick on 8/7/2009 at 14:13
well, as kolya said, some of us need to spawn to balance out the idiots.
Thirith on 8/7/2009 at 14:16
Quote Posted by PigLick
well, as kolya said, some of us need to spawn to balance out the idiots.
Based on Kolya's sweeping generalisation above your post, I'm worried about one thing:
how many people who say that should be numbered amongst the idiots?Starrfall on 8/7/2009 at 14:17
I can't believe anyone gives a shit about someone else not having kids.
Renault on 8/7/2009 at 14:22
They're just bitter because we're out having fun and they hate their fucking life.
Kolya on 8/7/2009 at 14:23
Quote Posted by Thirith
Based on Kolya's sweeping generalisation above your post, I'm worried about one thing:
how many people who say that should be numbered amongst the idiots?Inline Image:
http://www.strangebedfellows.de/Smileys/sbf/down.gifStitch on 8/7/2009 at 14:40
Quote Posted by Starrfall
I can't believe anyone gives a shit about someone else not having kids.
While I don't necessarily agree with the overly confrontational tone the anti-childfree side has adopted in this thread, they most certainly do have a point. Most childfree couples I've met--i.e. my closest friends--live in a state of suspended 20-something existence. I recognize that the freedom to get drunk when you want and purchase iphones and take two vacations a year is pretty compelling, but at a certain point--40, maybe?--that lifestyle will certainly grow stale. I'm not saying that all childfree couples are selfish and materialistic (or that having kids is the only next step of maturity), but these childfree friends of mine would all make fantastic parents, if only they'd take the plunge. The fact that they all have great qualities to pass on to children makes it all the more frustrating.
Renault on 8/7/2009 at 14:51
Quote Posted by Stitch
these childfree friends of mine would all make fantastic parents, if only they'd take the plunge. The fact that they all have great qualities to pass on to children makes it all the more frustrating.
You're missing the point - they don't
want to have kids. They might make great nuclear physicists too, or cops, or garbagemen, or whatever. That doesn't necessarily mean they should do it.
