BrokenArts on 16/1/2008 at 23:08
Inline Image:
http://modetwo.net/users/brokenarts/band.jpgIts easy to say dump her, which is true. But, you all know with it comes drama sometimes, have to think about things, and get ready. Its not always so cut and dry.
The_Raven on 16/1/2008 at 23:25
The Obvious: A pattern of behavior like that isn't a good sign.
I'm really not qualified for this. :p
Turtle on 16/1/2008 at 23:27
'Accidentally' slip it into her mud pit, then dump her.
Everyone wins!
Except her.
And possibly you.
Scots Taffer on 17/1/2008 at 00:19
Ahaha, oh Turtle.
Anyway, sorry to hear about that BioHaz and I agree with the throng of DTMFAs (Dump The Motherfuck Already) but I've got to say that it's always a little bit perplexing (and partake in a bit of schadenfreude) when people say "this whore just cheated on me" and you find out that they got together when "oh she cheated on her boyfriend with me". Cheaters are cheaters are cheaters.
Stitch on 17/1/2008 at 01:50
I don't quite see cheating as the DUMP THE WHORE situation internet males like to suggest it is. She may do it again, she may not. Some cheaters can recognize and address this negative piece of themselves, while some can't. Some could but just don't.
Will your girlfriend? The only person here who has any insight into that is you.
On a personal level, I've never really cheated, but lord knows I'm a better person for the various wonderful women who have given a skeeze like me a second chance in auto-dump situations.
icemann on 17/1/2008 at 02:19
Biohazard: Once a cheater always a cheater. My stance on cheating (after having it happen twice to me) is that if she truelly loved you, she wouldn`t have cheated on you in the first place. And so if shes cheated on you then shes not worth ya time, and that shes not worthy. Think like that and you can move on from stuff like that quite quickly.
To sum it all up. Soon as they cheat, dump em and leave em. Or to quote a saying I heard in an old Star Trek episode that I`ve never forgotten since:
"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me"
Ben Gunn on 17/1/2008 at 02:58
Quote Posted by Spaztick
Dump that whore.
Lol.. so succinct.
I dont know, guys- he sais he loves her and its hard to reach that state, at least for some men. (last time I felt a genuine romantic love was almost 10 years ago and I miss it :( )
But you definitly need a time-out. You should break up with her, let her cry, let her know how wrong were her doings and hate herself a little for what she caused- in the meanwhile you can evaluate things and see how you feel.
Chances are high she'll call you in a month or so and beg you to take her back- hopefuly youll know by then and if you do decide to take her back, it will be on your own terms.
fett on 17/1/2008 at 03:08
Here's some serious love life advice from an old married guy (16 years): Whether she 'truly loves' you or not isn't the issue. There are days, even weeks sometimes when I don't 'feel like' I 'love' my wife - not that we're fighting or hate each other at those times, it's just that the 'fizz' isn't there. Regardless, we made a commitment to each other, and a decision within ourselves to be exclusive to each other regardless of passing emotions, temptations, or apathy toward the relationship. Obviously if the emotion of love was absent for long months or years unending we would have to re-evaluate that commitment. Are there other people that we're both more attracted to than each other? Of course - there always will be, but that doesn't change the promise we made to be exclusive.
Here's the bottom line (at least for me): There will ALWAYS be the temptation to cheat on one another with someone else who is better looking, more 'in tune' with me, or possibly even trying to seduce me. But it doesn't matter because we've committed to each other. We both have moments of weakness, we admit the temptations are there, but we are very careful not to put ourselves in situations where we might give into those temptations.
So it isn't an issue of 'loving' each other SO much that we'd never cheat. It's an issue of a commitment we made. If you think this girl is capable of a relationship that operates on that level, then give it another shot. If her character is such that she is dominated by impulsive emotions, it won't be long until she does this again with someone she's more attracted to.
This 'love' we all speak of in such abstract terms is not an emotion at root- it's a decision. The true emotion of 'love' is only a symptom and by-product of the decision. I fear that for your girlfriend's part, any 'love' she may profess for you might be only an infatuation, not a decision she has made within herself that manifests itself in her faithfulness to you.
Or, ya know, you could just have an 'open' relationship and sleep with whoever you want. ;)
BrokenArts on 17/1/2008 at 03:13
To dump or not to dump. One thing is clear, she needs to quit this behavior. I'd make that perfectly clear to her. Date and grow some balls woman, be honest with yourself and the guy, and don't cheat. You get bored, move on then, instead of lying.
One thing fett, these guys are young, they'll do whatever they want. All the advice in the world will only go so far. I was married for 16 years too. Been around the block enough. They have to find out the hard way, and make up their own mind.
D'Juhn Keep on 17/1/2008 at 04:30
Quote Posted by Stitch
I don't quite see cheating as the DUMP THE WHORE situation internet males like to suggest it is. She may do it again, she may not.
Quote Posted by Biohazard
If somebody has a history of cheating on their boyfriends (I knew about a previous boyfriend she had cheated on)
I think you're mostly playing devil's advocate here in a situation that might be ambiguous but c'mon
