Phydeaux on 21/6/2005 at 14:02
The UK is a place where if a burgler breaks into your house you get arrested for whomping him on the head with a baseba cricket bat. Right now there's a group of doctors lobbying a ban on pointy kitchen knives because they think it'll reduce crime. :rolleyes:
No offense to my friends across the pond, but ya'll've got some fucked up laws there.
KublaiKrim on 21/6/2005 at 15:05
But the USA are the place where burglars get half a million $ when they got hurt:
Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Penn., was exiting a house he finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up because the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, so Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food. Dickson sued the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the tune of half a million dollars and change.
Ramirez on 21/6/2005 at 15:16
Quote:
Phydeaux The UK is a place where if a burgler breaks into your house you get arrested for whomping him on the head with a baseba cricket bat. Right now there's a group of doctors lobbying a ban on pointy kitchen knives because they think it'll reduce crime.
Well, that's a little off the mark.The doctors want to see kitchen knives reduced in length and 'pointiness' because the injuries caused by them are less life threatening. Knives are readily available in the house which means they are often the weapon used in crimes of passion. The doctors have looked at data that suggests a smaller/less sharp knife could have been the difference between life and death.
ACT SMILEY on 21/6/2005 at 15:17
If you sneak up and hit the burglar around the back of the head then yeah, you both get arrested. If he threatens you, either verbally or physically, you can then batter him to a reasonable degree of force (in other words, not dead)
The police are useless because a bit of mild drunken violence doesn't hurt the statistics as much as things like unsolved murders and rapes, and there's about three police officers in the country. Every time you talk to a police officer, they have a thousand and one better things to do than solve X, no matter what it is - a house on my street got robbed once (by chavs, of course) - they sent out a police car from the station thats up the road and round the roundabout at the end, took a few minutes to get there, took descriptions and statements of the two thieves and their car, checked the gardens because one of them ran that way while the guy loading the car drove off with the stuff. Then it all went into an "incident report" and nothing ever happened about it despite having a description of the car and its number plate.
I've also been pinned to a wall and punched repeatedly in broad daylight in a supermarket car-park been threatened with a knife in the same supermarket car-park, again in broad daylight. Problem is, chavs only operate when you're either alone (if you report it to the police, they just file it, cause theres no witnesses) or they have a huge numerical advantage. Only solution is to wait until the odds aren't too bad, focus on a small section of the ones with the biggest swagger and batter them as hard as you can. Either they then come back with twenty chavs, or that group won't bother you again.
Anyone else ever seen a war of chavs? I once saw two gangs of about twenty chavs, some with bottles and bats, battering the crap out of each other outside of a school near here. Luckily I was on a bus at the time.
Whats the most chav-less corner of the country? I want to go there :|
cabellero on 21/6/2005 at 15:52
Quote Posted by ACT SMILEY
Anyone else ever seen a war of chavs? I once saw two gangs of about twenty chavs, some with bottles and bats, battering the crap out of each other outside of a school near here. Luckily I was on a bus at the time.
Funnily enough, my friend was telling me a few days ago about a fight that broke out outside the cinema he workds at in Manchester. Apparently there were two gangs of chavs, at least 15 in each gang, who'd started battering each other outside the front doors. The fight moved inside, and him and his co workers were confronted with 30+ chav's beating themselves up in the foyer. My friend was on the edge of the fight, grabbed hold of a chav who had gotten too close to him, when at least 20 plain clothes coppers ran in through the front doors, with handcuffs attached to every item of their clothing, and began handcuffing everyone they came across. An officer grabbed hold of the chav my mate was holding and threw him against the wall, sending his head through it.
Oh how I wish I was there..
Chimpy Chompy on 21/6/2005 at 15:58
Quote Posted by Phydeaux
The UK is a place where if a burgler breaks into your house
you get arrested for whomping him on the head with a
baseba cricket bat.
Yes, and the USA is a place where if a person looks slightly suspicious outside your house, you break out the AK-47 and riddle them with bullets!
That said, I propose we sterilise all chavs. It's the only solution. :erg:
TBE on 21/6/2005 at 17:15
I would pound this retard into next week if he approached me. Course, on the videos he only picks on small people and people who aren't aggresive. Fuck sakes, I need to come over there and kick some chav butt.
SubJeff on 21/6/2005 at 17:22
But that is surely a spoof. A good one, but it can't be real.
quinch on 21/6/2005 at 17:27
yeah, for sure it is. It does look like he was brought up on a diet of pot noodles and microwave chips though. Method acting ?
Hogwash on 21/6/2005 at 17:38
Quote Posted by Chimpy Chompy
That said, I propose we sterilise all chavs. It's the only solution. :erg:
Every new born baby is implanted with some kind of chip that renders that person reversibly infertile. Upon turning the legal age of consent, you are able to apply to have a child and must take a 'parenthood test' that analyses your viability as a decent parent. If you pass, the chip is overridden and you are allowed to reproduce. If you fail, you can only retake the test once a year.
If a person is arrested three times or more, they become permanently infertile and restricted from reproducing through biotech methods (a criminal offence punishable by a prison sentence).
:joke:
