Starker on 5/2/2019 at 06:57
The Borowitz Report puts their own spin on the leaked private schedule of Lord Dampnut:
Quote:
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https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/americans-relieved-to-learn-that-trump-spends-sixty-per-cent-of-time-not-using-powers-as-president)
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—A leak of Donald J. Trump's official White House schedule has left millions of Americans deeply relieved that Trump spends approximately sixty per cent of each day not using his powers as President.
In conversations across the country, Americans called the revelation that Trump devotes the majority of his day to “executive time,” a euphemism for watching TV and checking Twitter, the most reassuring news out of the White House in months.
“Like most of the people I know, the idea of Donald Trump sitting behind his desk doing things that affect the country has me in a state of mortal terror,” Carol Foyler, a resident of Minneapolis, said. “Just knowing that he's spending sixty per cent of his time doing basically nothing makes me feel somewhat better.”
Harland Dorrinson, who lives in Detroit, agreed that it was “great news that Trump is only President forty per cent of the time” but called on the entertainment industry to create more diverting programming that might distract Trump for a larger portion of his day. “It would be fantastic if we could push the sixty per cent of his day that he does nothing up to seventy or even eighty per cent,” he said. “Maybe someone could come up with a podcast that he could get into.”
But Tracy Klugian, a Baltimore resident, said that the leak of Trump's schedule did little to allay her darkest fears. “Until I find out that he's spending a hundred per cent of his time not being President, I won't sleep at night,” she said.
Maybe that's how he gets his famous greatest memory of all time:
[video=youtube;SOM87mNHR1M]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOM87mNHR1M[/video]
Nicker on 5/2/2019 at 13:17
Borowitz suggests programming aimed to distract and pacify Trump? Colbert is way ahead of the pack on that...
[video=youtube;7jNYsTBJ_Bc]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7jNYsTBJ_Bc[/video]
But maybe Donny Small Hands has bigger distractions right now...
[video=youtube;zwXhobJy1u0]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zwXhobJy1u0[/video]
Nicker on 12/2/2019 at 00:59
Holy shit, Vae. Try not to be such an irrelevant cock all the time.
This isn't about whether or not Warren is an Indian it's about Trump being a fucking racist, either because he is an insensitive hate monger or because he's too ignorant to understand his own fucking tweets.
Can you follow that or do you need a diagram?
Vae on 12/2/2019 at 01:16
Quote Posted by Nicker
This isn't about whether or not Warren is an Indian it's about Trump being a fucking racist
Pay attention!!!...:grr:
I already said he was a racist!...Everyone knows that when you use the word "trail", that automatically makes you guilty of being racist!...
Inline Image:
https://www.ttlg.com/forums/images/icons/icon15.gif...Critical thinking, be damned!...:mad:
Nicker on 12/2/2019 at 01:35
Right. You were just joking... You actually aren't actually defending Trump.
Vae on 13/2/2019 at 01:17
*** BREAKING NEWS ***
Senate Has Found No Evidence Of Collusion Between Trump And Russia
[video=youtube;a4DKItxvKfU]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4DKItxvKfU[/video]
Trance on 13/2/2019 at 02:54
Well thank god that's over with. Now we know there was no point in doing any of these investigations.
Phew. Long live Trump.
Starker on 13/2/2019 at 03:22
Finally, the Republican-led Senate investigation has exonerated Lord Dampnut! No direct evidence of collusion!
In other news, a supporter of Lord Dampnut attacked a BBC cameraman at a rally, shoving him and trying to smash the camera.
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https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-47219957)
The idea that someone would attack Ron is frankly preposterous. He's the wrong guy. But of course it wasn't Ron that was being attacked.
To the drunken lout in the red Make America Great Again hat at the Trump rally, who bravely attacked him from behind while he was looking through the 12lbs (5kg) of camera on his tripod and couldn't see him, that didn't matter.
Ron wasn't Ron. Ron was the media. And the media are fair game, aren't they?
I covered endless Trump rallies in the run-up to the election and since - and there is a pattern. The attacks on the media are hugely popular with his supporters. They are every bit as much a part of his "set" as Honky Tonk Woman and Satisfaction are part of a Rolling Stones concert. You just can't imagine it not happening.
If you've never been to a Trump rally let me describe what it's like.
At some rallies at the end of the election campaign there were police officers posted on the access points to each press riser (the platforms where our cameras are mounted towards the back of the venue); even if there were no police they were confined areas.
There was no security last night, and the attack on Ron was stopped by a Trump-supporting blogger. Law enforcement were slow to get involved.
At some point in the president's remarks he will point a finger to where we are filming and you know then the fun is about to begin. "Have you seen a group of more dishonest people? They are fake news; they are the enemies of the people."
And like at a Christmas pantomime the crowd would jeer and boo. Honestly, for the overwhelming majority it is good fun; a part of the ritual. Like being at a football match and saying disobliging things about the referee.
But for a few - and I should add, a growing few, it is more than that. The uncomfortable truth is that with each month that passes the attacks have become more vociferous, the violent atmosphere on these occasions more palpable.
All of my colleagues have stories of occasions when they've been jostled; some have been spat at. Last night Ron heard the words 'CNN sucks' and '[expletive] the media' before he was taken down.
[...]
None of us goes into journalism expecting a grateful public to be throwing rose petals in our path as we walk along, or carrying us aloft as conquering heroes.
But in a healthy democracy surely we ought to be able to report a president's speech without - literally - having to look over our shoulder.